What Do You Recommend For Extreme Vaginal Dryness And Painful Intercourse Due To Menopause I Have A Hard Time With Creams And Getting Them Applied Properly And Timely
Creams can be messy, so it’s good to know there are other options available. For example, a vaginal ring releases a low dose of estrogen over 90 days to treat dryness and loss of elasticity. Or, you might benefit from an estrogen tablet to insert into your vagina. Your OB-GYN can talk through these options and help you choose the best one for your situation.
Don’t let a physical issue prevent you from great sex.800.922.0000
Is It Normal For A Man To Lose His Sex Drive
Is loss of sex drive normal as a man gets older? Its natural for men to notice a gradual decrease in sex drive as they age. The degree of this decline varies, but most men maintain at least some amount of sexual interest well into their 60s and 70s. Sometimes, however, loss of sex drive is related to an underlying condition.
Feeling Low After A Hysterectomy
Having your uterus removed can cause you to have feelings of loss or sadness. However, these feelings should pass.
If youre finding it hard to cope with these emotions, talk to your GP or consultant. You may be able to have counselling to help you work through your feelings. Find a counsellor near you.
It can also help to read about how other women have coped with similar experiences. You can read about womens experiences of hysterectomy at healthtalk.org.
Changing Hormones Can Be To Blame For Low Libido
It is common for women to experience a low libido at some point in their lives and while hormones are not always to blame, they can play a big role. Menopause can introduce physical changes that interrupt a happy sex life due to the loss of estrogen.
For some women the loss of estrogen can result in the vagina shrinking by 80%. Loss of estrogen can also wreck havoc on your genitals and thus your sex life. Menopausal women might also experience:
- Thinning of the vaginal tissue
- Slower or absent sexual arousal
- Less lubrication during sex
- Sensitive skin in the vaginal area
- Painful intercourse leading to inability to be sexually active
In addition, women who undergo hysterectomies experience a dramatic decrease in estrogen as well as lose up to half of their testosterone , which intensifies female sexual dysfunction. The good news is there is help! No woman should suffer with a painful, dry, unresponsive vagina and vulva .
Keeping Your Sex Drive After Menopause
Many women who are concerned about a loss of libido feel that its a very private and almost shameful thing that theyre finding it difficult to enjoy sex in the way that they want to.
There are many possible reasons why your sex drive isn’t what it used to be, including your physical or mental health and that of your partner. It’s worth discussing these issues first, but for many women loss of libido is directly linked to the menopause. Find out more about the other things that can get in the way of your love life.
A huge hormonal change takes place during menopause causing oestrogen production to decline. A key symptom is vaginal dryness which can make sex painful, which of course affects a womans ability to enjoy sexual activity. Other hormone levels drop off, causing a fundamental change in a womans brain sometimes reducing or shutting down their sexual desire altogether.
Read Also: Early Menopause After Tubal Ligation
What Happens To Sex After Menopause
Do you ever wonder? For every woman, menopause alters the field of play a great deal. During a period that might be anywhere from ones early 40s to early 50s, a lot happens. It starts with a period known as perimenopause which happens in the years before periods stop and is characterized by hot flashes and other symptoms. Menopause really begins after a woman has stopped seeing her menses for a year. The loss of estrogen and testosterone following menopause leads to changes in a womans body and sexual drive. Menopausal and postmenopausal women may notice that theyre not as easily aroused, and they may be less sensitive to touching and stroking. That can lead to less interest in sex. These changes also come along with a drop in blood supply to the vagina and this affects vaginal lubrication a great deal. There may be a loss of elasticity, moisture, and thickness of the vulva and vaginal tissues. All of these happens on top of emotional symptoms such as depression, anxiety, irritability and fatigue.
Where Does This Misconception Stem From
The idea that its impossible to orgasm once you hit menopause likely relates to the fact that many people do have more difficulty achieving climax once the menopausal transition begins.
Its also common to have less interest in sex in general, so you might stop prioritizing sex or making time for it at all.
This myth might also have something to do with outdated and completely inaccurate ideas about sexuality. Menopause, of course, marks the end of childbearing years and the transition into middle age and older adulthood. To some, this change might suggest an end of sexual desirability.
Yet, contrary to what others may believe or suggest, sex and continued sexual pleasure in middle and older age is typical, healthy, and absolutely possible.
Any of the menopausal changes you experience can make orgasming more of a challenge. But changes in sex drive and sexual pleasure usually relate to a combination of factors.
Also Check: Can Woman Produce Milk After Menopause
Low Libido Heres How To Have Great Sex After Menopause
Would you rather watch TV than tear up the sheets with your honey? After menopause, sex doesnt have to be a distant memory. Heres expert advice to help you boost your low libidoThe kids have flown the nest, youre no longer worried about getting pregnant, and the man in your life is still hot to trot. So why are you spending Saturday night binge-watching? Chalk it up to menopause. For many women, a low libido is just one more irritating byproduct of aging. About 80% of women reported some decline in sexual desire during menopause, according to a study published in 2013 in Britains The Obstetrician & Gynaecologist. Psychological issues including depression, stress and relationship problems can dampen sexual desire. But as women age, physical changes play a role too. A decreased production of estrogen, which can cause vaginal dryness, thinning and tightening, makes sex painful for 64% of women, according to the North American Menopause Society. When that happens, a protective mechanism kicks in and the brain starts deciding for you that its not interested in sex anymore, explains Ellen Barnard, MSW, owner of A Woman’s Touch Sexuality Resource Center in Madison, Wisc.
- Dark chocolate
If youre not in the mood, should you still give it the college try?
Why Do Women Stop Enjoying Sex After Menopause
When women stop enjoying sex after menopause, it can be for a number of reasons. Some of those are physical. For example, if you have vaginal dryness, it can make sex uncomfortable or even painful.
Other reasons can be psychological. After menopause, some people find it harder to tolerate behaviors in others that previously didn’t bother them.
If you’ve stopped enjoying sex after menopause, think about why. Depending on the reason sex has become less fun, the solution could change a lot. You might need more lubrication. You might also need to sit down and have a talk with your partner.
The Sex Surge Is Personal
Over the last eight years I have researched the Sex Surge and listened to many women and their stories of increased sex drive in perimenopause.
What I know is that each woman has to walk the path of the Sex Surge in her own way. For some this means big changes in their lives getting divorced, trying an open marriage, performing in burlesque shows, living on their own for a while. For others, it has meant small changes increasing the frequency of sex in their already happy relationship, wearing sexier clothes on a daily basis, flirting with the local barista a bit more.
Exploring the energy and finding ways to express it are key to handling the Sex Surge well, but what that looks like is unique to each woman, her life, and her needs.
Like any hormonal phase, the Sex Surge does come to an end. For most women it ends with small hormonal shifts that are steps on the path to perimenopause: the circuitry quietly returns to its normal supply.
In rare cases, the end of the Sex Surge is as if someone shut off the power entirely confidence, libido, and a sense of self crash into the dark. Most women report relief when the Sex Surge ends, even if it was great fun or allowed them to choose an amazing new life for themselves. They are glad to not think about or desire sex all the time.
READ MORE What causes brain fog during menopause?
How To Orgasm After Menopause
Putting the O in menopause: Tips on finding pleasure after the change from a sex therapist.
It can be difficult for many women to reconnect with their sexuality after the change, largely due to the many biological changes that can wreak havoc on the mind and body. However, its important to remember that sexuality and pleasure are well-within our control, and menopause doesnt change this fact.
Mia Sabat, sex therapist at Emjoy, the audio sexual wellbeing app for women, offers insights into experiencing sexual pleasure during, and after, menopause.
NSFW: The following content contains explicit references to the vulva and self-pleasure, and is best enjoyed in a private moment.
Also Check: Dr Yael Swica
Is There Anything You Can Try During Solo Sex
Solo sex isnt just something to do when you dont have a partner. It can be an enjoyable and empowering activity on its own.
If youre not in the habit of masturbating regularly, set aside time for some physical self-exploration to get to know your body a little better. Focus on what feels good, and you might find it becomes easier to orgasm without frustration.
Recommended Reading: Heightened Sense Of Smell Perimenopause
How Sex Changes After Menopause
Chris Kraft, Ph.D.
With no need to worry about getting your period, becoming pregnant or being walked in on by your kids, your postmenopausal sex life should be stellar, right? It can be good, but dont expect it to be the same type of sex you were having in your 20s, says Chris Kraft, Ph.D., director of clinical services at the Sex and Gender Clinic in the department of psychiatry at Johns Hopkins Medicine.
While you may have greater freedom at home, this is also a stage of life with a lot of changes that can affect your intimacy, he says. Youre redefining your roles and your relationship as the kids go off to college and your careers wind down. And youre also physically changing.
Read Also: Perimenopause Dizzy Spells
How Menopause Affects Sex Drive
A number of factors can affect a person’s sex drive, or libido. Because of this, not everyone’s libido is affected by menopause in the same way.
Although the changes in testosterone associated with aging can affect a person’s sex drive, research suggests that a loss of libido isn’t actually all that common. One study of 500 women in early and late menopause found that while 12% of the perimenopausal group reported a loss of libido, only 3% of the postmenopausal group reported the same.
What makes some people more susceptible to decreased libido? Testosterone fluctuations are only one factor. Other factors that have been shown to be associated with decreased sex drive during menopause include:
- Vaginal dryness
- Having children living at home
Run Your Hands Gently Through Her Hair
The scalp is one of the more neglected areas on the body during physical intimacy.
That being said, it remains an especially sensitive area and, when stimulated, is guaranteed to increase arousal.
Run your hands through your partners hair, ensuring that your fingertips come in contact with the scalp.
Be sure to move slowly in order to reduce the possibility of accidentally pulling or tugging on hair, which can become painful and uncomfortable.
Use your fingernails to gently caress the top of your partners head, ensuring that you come into contact with the entirety of the scalp.
This functions as an excellent precursor to further foreplay.
Also Check: Light Headedness And Menopause
Personal Story Too Tired Too Exhausted Too Busy To Have Sex
Clara, a full-time mum, is married to a high flying private-equity trader and is in her mid 40s. Claras concern was not only that her and her husband had stopped having intercourse a couple of years back, but also that she had lost all sexual desire and didnt quite understand what was happening. She was mildly depressed, excessively tired and lacked stamina. She came to the clinic because she thought it might have been a hormonal problem. After speaking to Clara, we realised that there was no intimacy between her and her husband. Her husband spent 12 or more hours a day at work and perhaps only two or three at home. He usually only had any relationship with the children and his wife on weekends. With a workaholic partner and no intimacy in their relationship, it was no wonder Clara had lost her desire for sex.
She wanted to resume a sexual relationship with him, but after six years was too scared to approach him let alone seduce him. All Claras blood tests for various hormone levels came back normal but in a low range. Of course, we could have given her some testosterone supplementation, which might have helped her to be more assertive, confident and might have countered her depression.
Clinical View Of Sexual Functioning
Davidson divided sexual functioning into behavior and potency, whereas Sarrel and Whitehead divided sexual functioning into the desire phase, excitement phase, orgastic phases, and dyspareunia. Both are useful ways to view sexual functioning when evaluating perimenopausal and postmenopausal women. These classifications are shown in .,
You May Like: Menopause And Dizzy Spells
Sex Drive After Hysterectomy
Some women have less interest in sex after having a hysterectomy. If this happens to you, your interest in sex may return as your recovery progresses.
If you and your partner feel it’s a problem, talk about it together so that it does not become an unspoken issue between you. You can also talk to your GP or find a counsellor who can offer help with sexual problems.
Our talking about sex page has tips from a psychosexual therapist, which you might find useful.
Lack of sex drive can be made worse by depression, menopausal symptoms, relationship problems and stress. These problems are often temporary, but if symptoms of the menopause or depression persist, see a doctor. Treating menopausal symptoms may boost your sex drive indirectly by improving your general wellbeing and energy levels.
A Husbands Guide To Having Great Sex After Menopause
There are many ways in which you can contribute to ensuring that you both continue having great sex after menopause. As biological and psychosocial factors indirectly affect a couples sexual relationship, you should not only think about sexual factors when you consider how to improve sex with your menopausal partner, but must also consider how biological and psychosocial factors influence sexual functioning.
Recommended Reading: Is Dizziness A Symptom Of Menopause
Ways To Increase Your Sex Drive:
- Reduce dryness with moisturizers and lubricants
- Talk with your partner about what you like
- Rest up. A recent study found that women who get enough sleep are much more likely to experience sexual interest or pleasure
- Schedule time for sex. Making a plan for sex gives you time to get in the mood
- Spend more time on foreplay
Its Best Not To Ignore Any Changes That Cause You Distress
You may cringe at the thought of talking to your gynecologist about sex. But rest assured, there is no reason to feel awkward. If you’re dealing with these changes and are very much unhappy with them, talk to your doctor. Right now, this may be a conversation that needs to take place via telehealth due to the pandemic. If you feel dismissed, then Dr. Rowen encourages you to consider switching to another provider if at all possible. Go find someone who will listen to you and take your problems seriously, Dr. Rowen says. Together, you can come up with a treatment plan that may help you have a more fulfilling sex life, even after menopause.
All products featured on SELF are independently selected by our editors. If you buy something through our retail links, we may earn an affiliate commission.
Don’t Miss: What Antidepressant Is Best For Menopause
Myth: Menopause Ends Sexual Pleasure
The facts: Menopause does bring certain changes that can negatively impact the physical aspect of sex, including:
- Loss of natural vaginal lubrication due to decreased estrogen production, which can make sexual intercourse painful
- Vaginal atrophy due to declining estrogen production, which may cause discomfort during sexual intercourse as well as urinary incontinence, vaginal infections, and other troublesome conditions
Fortunately, many effective treatments exist that can help restore your vaginal health, improve arousal, and increase your sexual pleasure.
We may recommend:
- A vaginal lubricant to ease dryness and discomfort during sexual intercourse
- Estrogen applied to the vaginal area via cream, suppositories, or a vaginal ring, to help repair and rebuild tissue
- Hormone replacement therapy to treat various symptoms associated with menopause, including the physical changes in your vaginal area
Interestingly, once weve eliminated your physical discomfort, regular vaginal sexual activity may help as well, since it increases blood flow to your vagina, keeps your vaginal muscles toned, and helps maintain vaginal elasticity.