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Do Women Still Like Sex After Menopause

What Effects Will Menopause Have On My Sex Life

How to have great sex after menopause

Menopause may cause changes in your sex life, or you may not notice any changes at all. Here are some possible changes:

  • Lower hormone levels can make your vaginal tissue drier and thinner. This condition, called vaginal atrophy, can make sex uncomfortable or painful.

  • Lower hormones may lower your sex drive. It may take you longer to get aroused.

  • Night sweats can disturb your sleep and make you tired.

  • Emotional changes can make you feel stressed or irritable.

Being less interested in sex as you get older is not a medical condition that requires treatment. But if changes in your sexual health bother you, talk to your doctor or nurse about ways to help, such as .

Does Sex Drive Return After Menopause

  • Does Sex Drive Return After Menopause? Center
  • Menopause is defined as when you havent had your periods for 12 consecutive months. Menopause generally marks the end of the reproductive cycle in women. As your estrogen levels drop, many physical and psychological changes ensue. One of them is that sex becomes less pleasurable. This may be due to multiple reasons, such as

    • Difficulty achieving orgasms due to dyspareunia
    • The declining desire to have sex
    • Other changes in your body, such as weight gain, joint stiffness and reduced stamina

    Though many women can still have the desire to have sex after menopause, it may be not as passionate as it was in their 20s.

    Keeping Your Sex Drive After Menopause

    • Overview

    Many women who are concerned about a loss of libido feel that its a very private and almost shameful thing that theyre finding it difficult to enjoy sex in the way that they want to.

    There are many possible reasons why your sex drive isn’t what it used to be, including your physical or mental health and that of your partner. It’s worth discussing these issues first, but for many women loss of libido is directly linked to the menopause. Find out more about the other things that can get in the way of your love life.

    A huge hormonal change takes place during menopause causing oestrogen production to decline. A key symptom is vaginal dryness which can make sex painful, which of course affects a womans ability to enjoy sexual activity. Other hormone levels drop off, causing a fundamental change in a womans brain sometimes reducing or shutting down their sexual desire altogether.

    Read Also: How Does Menopause Affect Sex Drive

    Ner Problems Can Be Fixed

    One of the worst nightmares for a woman in menopause is to have the freedom to have sex anywhere but to have a partner who cant perform anywhere, says Dr. Goldstein. Whatever the problempremature ejaculation, erectile dysfunction, low hormonestheres a treatment, compliments of modern medicine. Unresolved sexual problems can even have a silver lining. Menopausal woman may have more mature partners, who, due to performance issues, are open to the use of vibrators for a more satisfying sexual experience, Dr. Richards says.

    Myth: Menopause Ends Sexual Pleasure

    How to Deal with Painful Sex in Menopause

    The facts: Menopause does bring certain changes that can negatively impact the physical aspect of sex, including:

    • Loss of natural vaginal lubrication due to decreased estrogen production, which can make sexual intercourse painful
    • Vaginal atrophy due to declining estrogen production, which may cause discomfort during sexual intercourse as well as urinary incontinence, vaginal infections, and other troublesome conditions

    Fortunately, many effective treatments exist that can help restore your vaginal health, improve arousal, and increase your sexual pleasure.

    We may recommend:

    • A vaginal lubricant to ease dryness and discomfort during sexual intercourse
    • Estrogen applied to the vaginal area via cream, suppositories, or a vaginal ring, to help repair and rebuild tissue
    • Hormone replacement therapy to treat various symptoms associated with menopause, including the physical changes in your vaginal area

    Interestingly, once weve eliminated your physical discomfort, regular vaginal sexual activity may help as well, since it increases blood flow to your vagina, keeps your vaginal muscles toned, and helps maintain vaginal elasticity.

    Recommended Reading: What Causes Vaginal Odor After Menopause

    When To Talk To Your Doctor

    As a person goes through menopause, it’s natural for their experience of their body to change. However, there are certain signs that you should talk to your doctor. These include:

    • Irregular vaginal bleeding
    • Pain during sex or urination
    • Any symptoms that make it difficult to function in your life

    Even more mild symptoms may be worth talking to a doctor about if they’re making it hard to live your life. There may be options to help you sleep better and feel better, which can also help your libido and sex life.

    If symptoms persist even after estrogen therapy, it warrants evaluation for another cause such as vulvodynia , other causes of bladder pain, or pelvic floor dysfunction.

    People who are having trouble coping with the psychological changes of menopause should also consider talking with a therapist. A skilled sex therapist may be particularly helpful if you have difficulty figuring out how to reignite your sex life after menopause.

    Its Best Not To Ignore Any Changes That Cause You Distress

    You may cringe at the thought of talking to your gynecologist about sex. But rest assured, there is no reason to feel awkward. If you’re dealing with these changes and are very much unhappy with them, talk to your doctor. Right now, this may be a conversation that needs to take place via telehealth due to the pandemic. If you feel dismissed, then Dr. Rowen encourages you to consider switching to another provider if at all possible. Go find someone who will listen to you and take your problems seriously, Dr. Rowen says. Together, you can come up with a treatment plan that may help you have a more fulfilling sex life, even after menopause.

    All products featured on SELF are independently selected by our editors. If you buy something through our retail links, we may earn an affiliate commission.


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    Why Do Women Stop Enjoying Sex After Menopause

    When women stop enjoying sex after menopause, it can be for a number of reasons. Some of those are physical. For example, if you have vaginal dryness, it can make sex uncomfortable or even painful.

    Other reasons can be psychological. After menopause, some people find it harder to tolerate behaviors in others that previously didn’t bother them.

    If you’ve stopped enjoying sex after menopause, think about why. Depending on the reason sex has become less fun, the solution could change a lot. You might need more lubrication. You might also need to sit down and have a talk with your partner.

    Can A Woman Have Orgasm After Menopause

    Wife Doesn’t Want To Make Love After Menopause

    Whether a woman experiences orgasm after menopause depends on many factors. And, first of all, from her psychological attitude, state of health and from a mutual understanding between spouses. If a female perceives the onset of menopause as a threshold beyond which is dull vegetation, old age, and retirement, she does not pay due attention to her appearance and forget about femininity and attractiveness, then the fading of the sexual drive will also be a natural result.

    The opinion of experts unanimously boils down to the fact that achieving orgasm after menopause is a completely natural phenomenon. However, for this, a woman must learn to live a full life, without perceiving physiological changes as restrictions for normal intimate relationships.

    Having made some efforts, joy from sex can be obtained at any age, subject to certain recommendations that include:

    • regular visits to the gynecologist to prevent the development of various pathological and infectious processes
    • the use of drugs that reduce negative symptoms
    • active lifestyle
    • proper nutrition
    • good rest.

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    Sexual Dysfunction And Age

    Multiple factors determine female sexuality and libido. These include the health of the individual, her physical and social environment, education, past experiences, cultural background, and her relationship with her partner. Sex and sexuality after the age of 60 years may be affected by both individual physical changes of aging as well as the physical changes of aging in her partner. Therefore, with age comes a decrease in sexual activity. Aged women may be more concerned about problems related to intimacy, dyspareunia, decreased arousal and response, decreased frequency of sex, and loss of sexual desire., The incidence of sexual dysfunction in postmenopausal women is well over 80%. A recent survey of 833 menopausal women, aged 45 to 60 years, revealed that 38% of them expressed concern about changes in sexual function to their physicians.

    Initial studies report a decline in sexual activity in women as they age that is associated with a decline in subjective and objective health ratings, with an added incremental decline associated with the menopausal transition. One study confirmed that sexual activity in women and men decreases with age, and is highly dependent on marital status.

    Renegotiating The Daily And Sexual Relationship

    The couple may have to re-negotiate who does what as energy levels and motivation alter – especially if depression is an issue. The couple may also have to discuss and experiment with different sexual positions that would make intercourse more comfortable.

    I was on HRT and because of all the scares I came off it, my life became a total misery with mood swings, night sweats and depression. I tried all sorts of natural remedies, checked my diet and continued to exercise, but just felt really down. Recently I went back to my GP and he put me back on HRT. Ive got my life back.

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    Women And Menopause: Why This Group Wants To Change The Discussion

    After that day in the doctors office, I started searching online for anti-aging concoctions and experts. I was looking for someone anyone to guide me through my rapidly biological changing landscape. I tried bioidentical hormone creams, vitamins and supplements, birth control pills and eventually even hormone pellets anything that might make me feel like myself again. Through this barricade of bioidentical hormones, I kept the wolf of menopause at bay for years. It worked until it didnt.

    After turning 50, when I lacked energy and had no libido, I tried testosterone. That revved the engine back up again, but it also made me slightly aggressive and self-involved. After a while, my husband stopped coming to bed with me and preferred to just watch Vikings on his own, safe from my remote-seeking hands.

    It turns out, the biggest changes that hit in my 50s didnt have anything to do with how my body looked. My brain and my body began to sync up. An inner realignment occurred. I felt I could no longer force myself into situations or outcomes. It began with re-examining certain friendships or obligations that had run their course. I discovered the benefits of saying no, as opposed to the futility of trying to make everyone happy. It was also tremendously liberating to feel less inclined to prioritize everyone elses needs. With an empty nest, I got to call the shots. And I really listened to what my body all of it was saying.

    You Know What You Want

    Guide to Balance Out between Menopause and Sexual Health

    Think Mrs. Robinson in The Graduate. Older babes know what they want in the bedroom and dont have to be shy about it. Menopause is a very defining time for most women, many of whom realize that they have put their sexuality on the back burner for way too long, and if they dont use it, they will lose it for good, says Dr. Richards. Theres some data to suggest that women become less inhibited as they age, so its often a time of relaxation and being comfortable with who you are, and that often improves sexual functioning and sexual performance, says Dr. Wierman.

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    If Youre Trying To O Like Right Now Try This

    You really want to orgasm, but, for whatever reason, you just cant seem to get there. This can feel so discouraging that, eventually, you might decide theres no point in trying and give up entirely.

    While you can try a few different things to make an orgasm happen, its also important to keep in mind that you can still enjoy yourself, even without an O.

    Focusing on the pleasure youre experiencing in the momentwithout fixating on orgasm as a specific goal might just help you get there more quickly.

    For more satisfying sex, solo or partnered, try these tips.

    How To Increase Sex Drive After Menopause

    Sex drive during menopause can be a challenge at some point.

    However, its perfectly normal to feel challenged with your new body chemistry but this is your chance to find out different menopause sex drive natural remedies and tricks that can help you with your sexual problems. Sex after menopause can still be hot and enjoyable. Start from the basics.

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    Keep An Open Mind To Keep Your Sex Life Satisfying

    My takeaway was that we need to be more routinely asking women in midlife about their sexual function and whether there are barriers such as having pain during intercourse or if theyre having problems with low sexual desire thats bothering them, says Stephanie Faubion, MD, director of the Mayo Clinic Center for Womens Health in Rochester, Minnesota, and medical director of NAMS.

    Sexual function is usually under addressed in women in general but certainly in women beyond menopause, adds Dr. Faubion.

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    Find A Lubricant You Love

    What vaginal changes happen during menopause? Can Kegel exercises help?

    Vaginal dryness is totally treatable, says , MD, clinical professor of ob-gyn at Yale School of Medicine. One option is an over-the-counter vaginal moisturizer designed to be used regularly, say two to three times a week, rather than just before sex. Take a walk down through your local drugstore, and you’ll see many different brands.

    Then when you’re ready to hit the bedroom, apply a water- or silicone-based lubricant intended to be used in the moment, so you get even more of an assist. If you’ve never checked out lubricants before, you’ll be amazed at all the varieties, including natural, additive-free versions and some that come in single-use packets for a quickie on the go.

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    Men Get Real About Sex After Menopause

    I’ve run a few pieces in this Sex After Menopause series, each of them documenting real-life stories of women navigating midlife sexuality. Hearing from women is just half of the story, however. Men are clearly impacted by their lovers’ sexual evolutions, and their experience also deserves a forum. I’m grateful to the six men who agreed to share the most intimate details of their journey through menopause with the women they love.

    I married my best wife when she was 48, after 14 years with my worst wife. Had about six years of a wonderful sex life — at last!

    Then menopause hit and that was it. Sex became excruciating and libido packed up shop two years later . Doctors were no help. The only option they offered was HRT which she was afraid of due to the likelihood of encouraging breast cancer.

    That was it. Game over. I’m eight years younger than my wife and frustrated as hell with no one to be angry at. I’m grateful to have met my wife and for the brief time where I did have a satisfying love life, but God, it’s been a tough road to hoe since then. I have to say, the letters you’ve gotten from couples bragging about “no problems here” do read like Penthouse Forum — unbelievable, given my experience.


    We’re slowing down, but continue to make love five or six times a month, for which I am so very, very grateful. She is a sweetie.




    I am 68 and my girlfriend is 64. She is the sexiest, most orgasmic woman I have ever been with .


    A Husbands Guide To Having Great Sex After Menopause

    There are many ways in which you can contribute to ensuring that you both continue having great sex after menopause. As biological and psychosocial factors indirectly affect a couples sexual relationship, you should not only think about sexual factors when you consider how to improve sex with your menopausal partner, but must also consider how biological and psychosocial factors influence sexual functioning.

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    Talk It Out With Your Partner

    Even if it’s just the physical changes of menopause that are making sex painful, talking it out with your partner can help alleviate the stress and anxiety surrounding the topic. If you’re single or your partner isn’t the talky type, your ob-gyn is available to lend an ear. I always encourage women to have a good, trusted gynecological healthcare provider to speak with, Dr. Minkin says. A doctor, nurse midwife, or nurse practitioner can be a valuable source of advice.

    You may also want to talk to a sex therapist, who can help you be more open about what you need and want from your partner as well as reminding you that the changes you’re experiencing are perfectly normal.

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    Do I Still Have To Worry About Sexually Transmitted Diseases

    Tips for Tracking Your Bleeding

    Yes. Menopause and postmenopause don’t protect you against STDs. You can get an STD at any point in your life during which you’re sexually active. This risk doesn’t go down with age or with changes in your reproductive system.

    Left untreated, some STDs can lead to serious illnesses, while others, like HIV, cannot be cured and may be fatal.

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